Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Day 4: My Challenge to You

Look at this beauty. On sale down the street from my house, It reminded me of the movie Pleasantville.

This Blog is going to be short and sweet. I was going through my purse, and I came across my latest letter from Vasquez. In all my “busyness” I realized that I haven’t written to him in almost a month. I can’t imagine how he feels, I feel terrible for him. I feel like my classmates, and even myself at times, have done him a great disservice. He checked on us everyday, and was more than our Teacher, but was (and still is) our friend.

It hurts my heart to get letters from him and hear the heartbreak in his words on how his “friends” have left him because of his mistake. Being in Prison isn’t his punishment, the fact that those who said they would stand behind him have left him, is a mental and emotional anguish that none of us can understand. Yet he has never lost his faith, and is constantly reminding me

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you." Deuteronomy 31:6

So this is my challenge to you.

Stop reading this Blog.

Break out your pen and Paper.

Pick up your phone.

Bring up your email.

Write that letter, or make that phone call that you have been putting off. Let someone know you care. Let someone know that they are loved.

Monday, September 29, 2008

Day 3: The Dedication Blog: To Negative Nance, Dock time, Chris, Chad, Sue and everyone’s story


I miss my girls : [ and because I couldn't have dock time, I had the next best thing.
..
September 29th, 2008
..
I got to share my story with a new person today. The rush of emotions that (I feel) everyone gets are the same everytime. 1)Nervious 2)Shy 3)Honor 4)Skeptisism and 5)Relief. Its always cool (in my opinion) to share your story (testimony) with someone new.

I wonder what it is in our lives that makes us think our stories are so uninteresting, maybe its just me, but I long to know other peoples story, They're Skeletons, They're Scars.

When I was younger (and I imagine anyone who has an older sister they look us to has done this.) I relished in reading my sisters diary. Even if I got caught, which I did, more that once...(Sorry Carrie!!) I felt it was worth it, to know my sister's secrets. Even today I love it when my sister tells me details about her life. To me it is so much fun to swap stories, and in other ways to know that you're not alone. Crap I hope she still keeps a diary that i can read one day (with her permission...Jeez!!)

That has probably been my favorite part of the time I spent with TWLOHA, and with my Dock time with Hannah and Whitney.
Spending Dock time with you both kept my spirits up, and I know that sailboat races can be fun to watch with the right people.

The day we gathered and shared our stories. not only at spring break, but also this summer. I truly know from that experience that I am not alone. I met this guy named Chris. Let me tell you, he is an Amazing Man-Boy. He helped me a lot in my struggles. I love knowing that I know him and without saying anything, he can understand, He's been there. - Chris, Your an Amazing Man boy. Thank you for helping me. You have been a great friend, and a wonderful example. Don't ever change!

Chad. Chad Chuck. Wheat Thin! you are so freaking amazing! Thank you for helping me find my faith again.

I don't even have a good lead ino my time spent in the Cave/Darwf House/Pleasure Pit! I say that if I ever live in the attic craw space of a 100+ year old house, sharing a bathroom with 16 other people again, I want to do it with Momma Sue. I have laughed, cried, and shared more with Sue than anyone in my entire life. It takes a true friend to still love you when they fall down the stairs and laugh along with you. (seriously, watch the third step, it will kill you.)
Sue - You are more amazing than you know. I love you very much. I saw some girls car dancing the other day and almost cried. Stay Classy!

TWLOHA was an amazing experience. I love how so many stories intertwine to make up lives, and friendships.

To the rest of my TWLOHA friends... I love you. You will be "Featured" soon.

To anyone reading this, know that you have a story, and know that it matters!

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Day 2: The Velveteen Rabbit

Today’s pictures are interesting...

Moving





Driving down I-4, Some guy moving a refrigerator, the Freezer door is open, and there is a gallon tub of Ice cream sitting in it. If that isn't Polk County, I don't know what is.

The Worlds Largest McDonalds.


I haven’t been there in years, My sister and I Affectionately call it the worlds worst McDonald's.
I will have to try it again.

I cannot seem to get the man and woman who were at church last night. When I first saw her I though she was Mary Nelson, a lady that my mother’s church had helped in the past.
I hope they are doing well.

I don’t know why, but all of this has reminded me of my favorite Childhood story.
Many of you who know me really well, know that I carry around a copy of The Velveteen Rabbit in my purse,. I found a small bookmark of my favorite part of the story in my sister's bible yesterday. (Thanks Fatima!) and I thought that I would share about it. I believe that this story is the ultimate description of love and being a real person and found in the pages therein. Like the boy in the story, God is the only one who can make us real. I was reminded last night of how God looks beyond our outward appearance, to see the true beauty that is us.

“The Skin Horse had lived longer in the nursery than any of the others. He was so old that his brown coat was bald in patches and showed the seams underneath, and most of the hairs in his tail had been pulled out to string bead necklaces. He was wise, for he had seen a long succession of mechanical toys arrive to boast and swagger, and by-and-by break their mainsprings and pass away, and he knew that they were only toys, and wpould never turn into anything else. For nursery magic is very strange and wonderful, and only those playthings that are old and wise and experienced like the Skin Horse understand all about it. "What is REAL?" asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?" "Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real." "Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit. "Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt." "Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?" "It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand." "I suppose you are real?" said the Rabbit. And then he wished he had not said it, for he thought the Skin Horse might be sensitive. But the Skin Horse only smiled. "The Boy's Uncle made me Real," he said. "That was a great many years ago; but once you are Real you can't become unreal again. It lasts for always." The Rabbit sighed. He thought it would be a long time before this magic called Real happened to him. He longed to become Real, to know what it felt like; and yet the idea of growing shabby and losing his eyes and whiskers was rather sad. He wished that he could become it without these uncomfortable things happening to him.”

The Rabbit (like Me) wishes that I could become “real” with out uncomfortable things happening, but I try and remember
"You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand." "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt."

I would like to note, that unlike the boy in the story, God will never be forced to throw us out. He will love us no matter what.

I know that this has been all over the place, but it all makes sense to me, and I try to use this principal whenever I can.
My mom bought me this little ornament yesterday. When I first saw it, I put it back. One of the little birds eyes was missing. After putting it back I stood there for a long time. Finally I picked it back up and decided that I wanted it. After examining it a second time, I decide that I really would pick out another one that was worth buying. As I put it back, the birds other eye preceded to fall off. It was in that moment that I knew I had to buy it. It reminded me that at one time, not so long ago, I wouldn’t be “bought” because I was not whole or perfect. Jesus Bought me as I was, not because I had something to give, but because he thought I was worth it.
Never doubt a persons worth according to they’re look or circumstance.

Saturday, September 27, 2008

Today has been a day of travels and journey's. Because I can't seem to journal or reflect on my own, I am committing to Blogging and taking a picture every day for the next year, and then reflecting on those.
I think It will be a time of growth and expression. Thanks for coming along for the ride : ]



This is a picture I took getting off of I-4 going home. I have been hearing a lot about Community since I got home from TWLOHA. Its been almost funny how much I've heard about it. I got to do a lot of reflecting on the way to and from Tampa.

First, Family is Important, no matter what, and my family is pretty rad. Took Flowers to my sister today and everybody was like "aww that is so sweet!!" and the whole time I was thinking "Do you live with goons?? its really not that big of a deal!" but on the way home I realized not everyone has a family like mine.
I went thrifting today (How I miss Nada!) and I picked up the book "Where The Heart Is" by Billie Letts. It reminded me of Switchfoot's "This is Home" and MGMT's "Time to Pretend" While I am excited to be getting out on my own soon, I am still looking for my "home" Yet once I do move out on my own, there will be things about home that I will miss greatly. While it may not be picture perfect, I am glad to be back in Polk. I miss Cocoa, or rather what I thought Cocoa was.

The second thing I realized today, as much as she frustrates me, or annoys me, I still need my mom. Don't get me wrong, I still want to do things on my own, but she is a wise woman, and I hope that I can learn to appreciate her fully.

Lastly, I saw a tremendous example of Love and Patience tonight. (I have been attending Roots Community Church, and let me tell you, it is AMAZING! Contact me for time and directions!)

Jesse (The Pastor) showed tremendous Love and patience tonight. There was a very broken woman in attendance tonight, and how Jesse kept his cool was truly a God thing. I hope the woman gets the peace she needs. It is a true community church.

Tonight has been a true lesson in Community.

Community is there in the Good and Bad, and community is never ending, but make sure your Community is there to back you up, make sure those in your community are telling you more than words.